He don’t practice Santeria, and the crystal is just glassware… — I’m racing to finish my dishwashing shift at Atchafalaya. It’s only my second or third time washing dishes — normally I’m a busboy. They’ll let me wait tables when I turn 16 in a few months. It feels weird to be sweating through a white tee-shirt, it’s almost see thorough…

What could be better than some alone time, without any distractions? — Pure silence. Pitch black. Just me. Alone. It’s so fucking relaxing. I’m floating atop what might as well be a pool of amniotic fluid, breathing in the aroma of uber-salinated water and the bleachy scent of my own jizz that just exploded out of me. I haven’t come that hard…

And when you start repeating your work in a group … you’re going to soar — The Ashtanga yoga practice is nothing if not repetition. Each time you practice you do … the same warm-up the same sequences each pose for the same number of breaths (five is the magic number) Structure?! I don’t need your stinking structure! I used to think I didn’t like structure. And don’t get me started on “morning…

Some day her prince will make her come — “Oh for the love of Mickey would you shut the fuck up!” Snow White shouted from her bed and pulled her sleep mask back down over her eyes. Whose idea was it do be so bright at 10 in the morning? “And shut the damn curtains.” One of her bluebirds…

More adventures on the yoga mat — You told yourself that when you got to the Cape you would take a yoga class the next morning. You woke up ridiculously early (hello, time zones) and tried, without much success, to make sense of the scribbling you did over the past few days. You’ve been feeling disjointed and…

Sure, it costs a bit more, but I’m worth it — “Okay, baby, we’re almost done,” Khaht said, gently dabbing my neck with a swatch of gauze. Her latex-covered fingers were smooth and cool as they brushed my tender flesh. “You need anything?” she whispered. She had the most soothing voice, the faintest hint of an unidentifiable Eastern European accent layered…

№ 52 of 💯 — The things we forget and the things we cannot — “Some things were never meant to be found.” There was a tone in his voice I had never heard, not in all the years since mom brought him into our family. We’d called him Uncle Artie, but he wasn’t related. He’d gone to high school with Mom’s older sisters and…

Much like the Icona Pop banger, I don’t care — A while back, my Medium pal (and fellow Chelsea-when-it-was-Cheslea inhabitant) kt lee tagged me in a post to talk about things that I can’t be fussed about. This is gonna be so easy, I thought. I told her I’d have it out in a couple of days. Road to hell…

If Morning Ever comes … if only life were as simple as an Anne Tyler novel — A few weeks ago, I came down with COVID. Despite being triple-vaxed and having already had it, I let it get me. Round two was much less easy than my first nearly-asymptomatic bout, but I’m fully recovered, again. And I’m very grateful for the science that’s kept me relatively well. …